Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

My boss called me on a Saturday to let me know he that due to financial reasons, I was no longer needed effective immediatley. 3 days later, he sends me a text asking about work issues. How do I respond?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

5 Observations on Jaguars Minicamp Day 2 - Sports Illustrated

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I can read

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Aston Martin announce Stroll to miss Spanish Grand Prix - F1

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Your Apple Watch Is Getting a Neat New Feature That You’ll Actually Use - Gear Patrol

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have complete contempt for fakery

How do I deal with my annoying little kids?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I can count

Observations From Titans Minicamp on Thursday - Tennessee Titans

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

The people who are 'allergic' to humans - BBC

I don’t buy bullshit

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Observations from Day 5 of OTAs - Cleveland Browns

I see through liars

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t cotton to rapists

Is homosexuality an excommunicable offense in Christianity?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand how hurricane paths work

I actually pay taxes

Stocks Go Back to the Future. Tariffs, Apple and Fed Are Potential Catalysts and 5 More Things to Know Today - Barron's

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

What are the different types of networking?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Scientists reveal how to cut onions without crying, and their method is incredibly simple. - Farmingdale Observer

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Staying in This Place Too Long Could Change How You Age, Scientists Say - The Daily Galaxy

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

This 2019 Movie With 99% On Rotten Tomatoes Was Voted The Best Of The 21st Century - SlashFilm

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have a reading level above third grade

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write